Life with Cutlet has been interesting. He’s definitely becoming a mamma’s boy and wants nothing to do with others when I am around. For over a month now, he’s been co-sleeping with us and his crib is just a glorified dump-yard. He’s just over 2 months old (2 months & 5 days) and on his 2nd month birthday he flipped from his back to his belly!! He has also been in 3-6 month clothing for the past 2 weeks, no longer a newborn 😢. His hands are always in his mouth now and the drool, oh my lord the drool is everywhere. I have resorted to putting a bib on him all the time.
With his various “achievements”, come the issues too. He was down with a stomach infection twice in the last couple of weeks, which translated into diaper rash and a whole lot of nursing which has not been kind to my “girls”. While he’s taken to a bottle, he refuses to have one when I’m in the vicinity I start work in 3 weeks and am using all my spare time to pump so that the cutlet can have breast milk 90% of the time but he just will not give me respite from nursing, to pump! I know, first world problems.
I am currently going through another bout of depression I think. I am terrified of staying alone with the baby anymore; I am worried of hurting him, injuring him or worse, causing some sort of permanent damage to his teeny tiny little body. I’ve been sending him over to my parents during the day for the last week or so to get him used to being with them when I start work, but seriously when I drop him off or Appa comes to take him, I feel like a load is taken off my shoulder. The time from when the DH leaves to work and Appa coming to pick the cutlet (~2 hrs) feels like a lifetime to me. My hands shake when changing a diaper or feeding him or changing his clothes or rocking him to sleep. I am so annoyed with myself because I thought the post-partum depression period was over and frankly I thought I was stronger than this. I am hoping this I another phase because I don’t want to miss out on my beautiful son’s childhood and long to be the wife/girl friend (before cutlet), to the DH.
Apart from the Cutlet, I think the DH and I are going through a trying time in our life. There has been major lay-offs at the DHs organization and his job is also a question mark now.This is really worrying because of the home loan and baby, we are dependent on 2 incomes to maintain our current lifestyle. Speaking of home, our assole neighbors in the apartment have suddenly decided on a no-pet policy because Atom uses the lift!! We are seriously pissed because come January an association will be formed and it will be us against 35 apartments and I have no doubt that it will not swing in our favor We obviously are NOT giving up Atom which means moving (possibly) to another place with a 6 month old, leaving our OWN house to a RENTED place that is hopefully pet friendly. We are so damn annoyed and frustrated
Hoping things work out, pray for us, will ya?